We are in good hands! February 27, 2009
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We are in good hands!
Julius Malema meets with Nelson Mandela. He asks him, “Mr President, how
did you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give
to me?” “Well,” says Mandela, “the most important thing is to surround
yourself with intelligent people.” Malema frowns. “But how do I know the
people around me are really
intelligent?”
Mandela takes a sip of tea. “Oh, that’s easy. You just ask them to answer
an intelligence riddle.” Mandela pushes a button on his intercom. “Please
send Thabo Mbeki in here, would you?” Thabo Mbeki walks into the room.
“Yes, my President?”
Mandela smiles. “Answer me this, please, Thabo. Your mother and Father
have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is
it?”
Without pausing for a moment, Thabo Mbeki answers, “That would be me.”
“Yes! Very good,” says Mandela.
Back in Luthuli House , Malema asks to speak with ANC president Zuma.
“Answer this for me. Your mother and your Father have a child. It’s not
your brother and it’s not your sister. Who is it?” “I’m not sure,” says
Zuma. “Let me get back to you on that one.”
Zuma goes to his advisors and asks everyone, but none can give him an
answer. Finally, he ends up at the COPE meeting and bumps into Terror
Lekota. Zuma looks around to see if anyone can overhear them whisper,
“Terror!
Can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and
it’s not your brother or your sister. Who is it?”
Terror whispers back, “That’s easy. It’s me!”
Zuma smiles and says “Thanks!”
Zuma goes back to Luthuli House to speak with the youth leader. “Say, I
did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It’s Terror
Lekota.” Malema gets up, stomps over to Zuma, and angrily yells into his
face, “No, you idiot! It’s Thabo Mbeki!
COLOURED MAAK ‘N PLAN February 27, 2009
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An old man lived alone in Cape Town . He wanted to spade his potato
garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, Clemence, who used to
help him, was in Polsmoor Prison. The old man wrote a letter to his
son and described his predicament.
“Dear Clemence, I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won’t
be able to plant my potato garden this year. I’m just
getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all
my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me.
Love,
Papa”
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
“Dear Papa, For heaven’s sake, Papa, don’t dig up that garden, that’s
where I Buried the BODIES. Love, Clemence”
At 4 A.M. the next morning, the Scorpion Unit, NIA agents and local
police showed up and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies.
They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man
received another letter from his son.
“Dear Papa, Go ahead and plant the potatoes now. That’s the best I could
do under the circumstances. Love Clemence.”
Think… and VOTE February 24, 2009
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Uploaded via Facebook MobilePlease, even if you don’t read this, pass it on to everyone you know with a brain.
Hello fellow citizens
If like me, you don’t have a passport from another country and you quite like living in South Africa, now is quite an important time for you.
Instead of using clichs like “the future is in your hands..” or “make your mark, let your voice be heard!” and other ineffective drivel, I am going to just draw your attention to the following:
Bob Mugabe had to amend the constitution of Zimbabwe to allow him to remain in power as president, long after he had reached his intellectual sell-by-date. (Before this, as in all “democracies”, there was a limit to the number of terms which a president could serve). Having changed it once, he did it again. Then he was on a roll. The rest of the story we all know very well. With hindsight, we can see that had he been prevented from taking the first step, the whole sub-Saharan part of Africa would have been spared quite a lot of bother.
When Hitler took over Germany he systematically turned it into a fascist police-state, where no-one (no, not even German citizens) had any freedom. He did this by passing one piece of legislature after another. Slowly he started to ban things (like women shaving their legs and underarms). Next he formed a special police force which was under his personal control (the infamous Gestapo) to enforce these new laws. Then he banned some more things, like jokes, clever books and talking about him behind his back. By the time he had mobilised his army, and banned being Jewish or trying to stop him from invading your country it was TOO LATE! He had gained too much momentum.
“How did he and Bob manage this?” you may ask.
I’ll tell you how: Baby steps.
Each time they changed something, they convinced all the stupid people that it was for the greater good. Clever people, who could tell that it wasn’t, thought to themselves “Surely they won’t get away with this” over tea and rusks, but did nothing. By the time someone decided to stand up and make a scene, his house had been burned down and his head was firmly wedged between an S.S. boot and the pavement outside.
Now, I’m sure we all agree that one “Jacob Gedleyihlekisa Zuma” possesses neither the intellect, balls or charisma to start a world war. ( Mind you – remember Idi Amin from Uganda). However, he has somehow managed to wangle his way into a position where he can very well take the first baby step towards making a complete pig’s ear of our country. Old-school racist whites are always on about our country going to the dogs and ending up like Zim. Of course they did this because they were narrow-minded and ignorant, not because they were keeping a keen eye on actual political developments. Our downfall will not be racism as everyone predicted in 1994, it will be corrupt politicians driven by greed and a hunger for power. And people drinking tea saying “surely they won’t get away with that?”.
Now,
JZ’s trial has been scheduled for August (which is AFTER the election). After winning the election, the ANC plans on amending the constitution to prohibit the acting president from being prosecuted in a court of law. Just like with Bob Mugabe, the most fundamental law of the country will now be changed to suit the whims of a criminal with no brain. (Never mind the fact that this would actually mean that he could literally commit murder and get away with it until he steps down as president). Our constitution is literally the anchor which stops our country from drifting down river and over the edge of a waterfall. It leaves ultimate power in the hands of the courts and judges and prevents government from raising itself above the law. To allow anyone to mess with it is equivalent to committing a slow national suicide.
The ANC no doubt thinks they will again get the two thirds majority they need to tinker with the constitution in the April election.
I beg to differ.
I hope and believe that, unlike the sheep of the past in Germany and Zimbabwe, the average person who receives this mail has actually had enough of all these shenanigans and would like to see the appearance of justice, logic and efficiency in government.
Unfortunately, we are in the minority. However, to prevent things from getting worse really fast, all we have to do (for now) is:
VOTE !!!!!!!!
And then, when the election comes, vote for anyone except the ANC. You can vote for Vernon Koekemoer or Skippy Peanut Butter for all I care, just as long as the ANC does not get a two-thirds majority!
I swear on my grandma’s grave… if I hear someone (who didn’t vote or couldn’t vote because they were too lazy or hungover to register) complaining at a braai about the government I will come in from the side with a flying head-butt which will leave you so brain-damaged you’ll join the ANC youth league and vote for Julius Malema in 2013.
This country is genuinely amazing, lets not let a small handful of people use it as their personal monopoly set and turn it into another post-Collonial African 3rd World sad story.
Vote, dammit! People are willing to die fighting for the right to vote. If you don’t, and you end up watching as the country slowly slides into an abyss it will be “on you”.
Ok, enough.
Who Is This…? February 19, 2009
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Aint he proud!!!
We Need A Change – Part 2 February 19, 2009
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We Need a Change!!!
Part 2
The Coloured race has always been the out cast in South Africa, so to speak. During Apartheid (pre ‘94) we were to Black to be White and since our first “Democratic” election (post ’94) we are to White to be Black. What we and others tend to forget is that most if not all the skill labour that built this country were the Coloured people. The Apartheid government did us a ‘huge favour’ by providing our fathers, grandfathers, uncles, great grandfathers and the rest of the famn damily the opportunity to be artisans like boiler-makers, pipe-fitters, welders and the like.
Our modern situation with the Coloured people is not a pre or post ’94 problem; it is a ‘culture’ thing. Don’t even try and tell me the Bruin-ous don’t have a culture. Wine, women and song that is their cultural philosophy. Live for the moment, not the day, year, years or even further. For many it is more like live to the next ‘Good Time’, what ever that may mean to them.
After the F.A.S come the Mental Apathy, maybe this is a by product of the damage done during the developmental stages in the womb. No sense of responsibility, no care about the future, no interest in improving their current or future situation. Their understanding of improvement is making sure you have the latest cell phone, home theatre system, all the bling, partying most if not every week-end and the latest Jewish. The house or government flat can be falling apart, the school fees won’t be paid, one person working in the house and the basics are scarce. You cannot tell me in this day and age there is no hope for the Coloured then I must be stupid, deaf and blind or living in another world or together. For all the Coloured people who have and are still making it, come on.
Is it not amazing, just when you feel there is nothing left along comes one that hits you between the eyes? Once again, the Bruin-ous have done it, Miss South Africa two years in succession. My experience has enlightened me to some amazing facts about the future of the Coloured people in this country. Since 1994, which was our first democratic election it seems as though the Races are in a race to see who can have the most amount of mixed marriages. As we, all know that any two Races that procreate that offspring is a Coloured.
Let’s take a walk down achievement lane:
- Head coach of the Australian national netball team – Bruin-ou
- 2007 World Rugby Tournament Player of the tournament – Bruin-ou
- Miss South Africa two years in succession – Bruin-ou
- So You Think You Can Dance winner 2008 – Bruin-ou
- Idols 2007 winner – Bruin-ou
- Google South Africa CEO – Bruin-ou
I know you saying that these are just a few, I am saying who will be next to follow in their foot-steps. Yes we all cannot be in the limelight but what are we doing to make a difference and to change this mindset.
We Bruin-ous have about forty years since ‘94 to get our act together so that we can run this country effective and efficiently. Taking into account the recent good publicity that our Race group has received shows that it does not take much for us to accomplish and be acknowledged. I believe that we as the ‘mixed race’ have all the ability within us and we need to stop looking for handouts and recognition, but rather go out there and make it happen for ourselves and the rest will follow. There are many people out there achieving and there are just as many watching are giving praise where praise is due. This praise has not been the motivating factor for those who have acquired the recognition lately but rather people knowing themselves, their strengths, weaknesses, ability, inability and limitations. From this they have not allowed anything else to stand in their way not even “skaam cells” if maybe they “hit-a-flop”. For these people to achieve the greatness they have, those words will not exist in their vocabulary.
Respect February 12, 2009
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RESPECT – A LADIES RIGHT
With all the uproar and outcry, we hear from ladies/women for equality, the fight against abuse and the continuous battle to climb the corporate ladder. I ask the question – is this really necessary? Or more so, why are they behaving like this? I set out to find the reason. Part of my finding was that life has become something of survival rather than living and enjoying life.
My memory goes back to the days of when women cooked like their mothers, now it seems like they drink like their fathers. No, I am not saying that women should be barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen or that they are not allowed to drink. I have seen and heard of men cooking, I do some of it myself from time to time as well as have an occasional drink. So I really don’t think these are so bad going across the divide but not living there.
“All the women independent throw your hands up with me …” “It’s time for me to do it on my own; I’ll live my life the way I feel…” No matter what, let’s keep it real is back in the “good old days when boys and girls played foolish game”. Sorry, but I regard myself as an old fashion guy and I believe that ladies/women need to be treated with respect and men need to behave like gentlemen.
During my travels I once read that it is us men who have actually created this situation. After reading an article titled “Teach your daughters how to choose the ‘right husband’. This not only opened my eyes but it also scared me to think that they manner in which a man treats his wife and daughter become a norm in future.
Respect is one of those “things which comes with “love”. Now, I do understand that there has been a big distortion of this word ‘love”. But RESPECT. I think from a real man is that the woman comes first, her feelings, her well-being, her interests and security and I believe that a real woman will see this and she will know what to do in return.
My appeal to you women and ladies out there don’t be fooled with the initial impressions rather wait a little longer. Don’t rush into it, because the honeymoon seems to end very early in the marriage.
My appeal to all women and ladies is to rather fight for your respect, your right to be treated with respect, love, care and understanding.
